Every person in a relationship comes from a different family system to their partner. Some families love to share feelings between members while other families avoid sharing feelings at all costs.
It is difficult when one partner comes from a family system where they learnt to shut down their feelings and the other person came from a family system where everyone was transparent.
But what do two people do in a relationship where they both came from a family system that sharing feelings was not the done deal!
Maybe the husband as a child was called a sissy by his father if he cried while the wife as an adolescent was told by mum after losing a boyfriend “there are plenty of other fish in the sea!!”
Both messages say “You’re not valued. Your feelings are not important.”
Now there are two people in a relationship who can’t share feelings. Instead, they shut down and pull away from each other when there is conflict or offences committed in the relationship.
What this looks like is criticism, contempt, and a definite disconnection emotionally and physically.
If you recognise yourselves here do not hesitate to click on the link below for a booking today and support.
