Children need predictability, security, and stability in their lives.
Just because you have moved on from the parent of your kids, doesn’t mean your kids need to.
It is never a good idea to introduce every new partner to your child.
It creates instability, anxiety, depression, anger and jealousy.
Make sure your partner is in your life and the children’s life long term.
Some things to consider.
Is your partner going to be a stable influence on your kids?
Reassure your kids understand they are not being replaced.
When you have been dating for a few months, gently tell your kids about the new person in your life.
Ask the kids if they would like to talk to your partner on facetime or go on a picnic together to meet them?
Don’t expect your kids to be happy about your new relationship.
They may feel protective of the other parent and that is ok. It may take a while for the kids to accept this new person who will be in their life.
Kids often secretly want their parents back together which is normal. Mum and dad are a child’s whole world.
Explain to your new partner the kids feel apprehensive about this new relationship. Explain to your partner this is going to be a slow process.
When you do finally all agree to meet, arrange something that is kid friendly like a BBQ at the beach, or a picnic, dinner out etc.
After your partner has left, at home ask your kids how they felt the outing went.
You don’t need to ask your kids permission to date your partner.
Instead, ask if they would like to do it again at another time.
Talk to your new partner how they thought the outing went.
Wait until your kids are comfortable with your new partner before getting everyone together over a meal at home.
Just because your kids have met your new partnerner a few times doesnt mean they’re ready for the new partner to move in.
Wait until the kids are comfortable with this new person.
Ask how the kids feel around someone moving in.
You will need to set boundaries around parenting, respect between the kids and your new partner.
It will take patience and listening to each other to blend the family.
If you would like further support for your family, click on the link for a booking today.
