Relationships are difficult in any family but blended families come with their own challenges.
When there are two households involved, they’re going to come up with their own set of rules and boundaries.
Maybe one household is seen as the “fun” family because they have fewer rules and the child/children are only there every second weekends while the household the child/children mainly reside in is more structured.
This is normal and can be hard for the child/children to come to terms with until they are used to their new routine.
With separation and divorce comes animosity between the parents and even their partners. It is important the children are put first with everyone agreeing to work with each other so the children live in peaceful and stable environments.
When adults argue over who has what child and when it is not unusual for a child to blame themselves for the arguments. They need to know these are adult issues and they are still loved.
When a child/children visit the other parent, it is important for that parent to engage with their child. This might mean taking them to a park, the shopping centre, movies, lunch or dinner. Play some games with them.
If a child is visiting their parent and asks the parent if can they do this and that and the child is told “I can’t be bothered?”
I’m too tired”, the child returns home feeling not loved or valued, especially if it is on every visit.
Especially during separation/divorce, children need continual reassurance they are loved and valued.
When parents don’t engage with their child/children on their access weekend, the child/children return to their custodial home reactive. When this happens, the other parent needs to be patient with their child/children and wait for them to open up to them.
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