Do you feel disconnected in your relationship?
Or has your partner complained they do not feel connected?
Look at your communication styles. Is one listening while the other is talking?
Listening is not about waiting to get your say. Listening also involves validating the other person’s experience and feelings.
It is common for one partner to shut the other person down or be dismissive during conflict. The other person will either get louder to be heard or shut down emotionally and pull away.
This will damage the physical connection.
If one person goes into an argument they are always right, that leaves the same person to always be wrong or back down.
If the same person is in a position where they feel they’re automatically wrong, both people lose in the relationship.
When entering conflict, get away from the mindset of right and wrong.
Instead, be ready to explore another perspective. Remember, you are both part of the same team. Resolution takes team work.
Always consider the other person during conflict. You don’t want to leave your partner feeling wounded, attacked or feeling dismissed.
Take into consideration your personalities. One person may be rational and or black and white while the other person may operate on feelings.
The rational person will listen to the conversation and it has to make sense for them. Then they may listen for the tone of voice or read the body language before it affects their feelings. This type of personality may be blunt with their delivery of their message.
But if their partner is a feelings personality, they will be affected by the tone of voice and then the body language before they hear the message. So if a rational partner enters conflict with “all guns blazing”, their partner has already got their walls up because they’ve picked up on the tone of voice and body language of the frustration and annoyance of their partner.
