important things to consider with a blended family (1)

Important things to consider with a blended family

Make sure as partners you are on the same page and are a united front. Kids are very intuitive. They can work out what is going on between parents even if they don’t say anything.

It will help the kids to mesh if their parents work well as a team. It helps them feel secure within the home.

Discuss ahead of time your strategies around parenting.

Will you only discipline your own children?

Will you spend time building a relationship with each other’s children?

What do discipline, boundaries, and chores look like?

Have you considered the age difference of the kids regarding discipline, boundaries and chores? Are they age-appropriate?

Do the children feel safe after a weekend or week with their other parent when they return or are they met with a barrage of questions about what goes on in the home of the other family?

This puts the children between their parents and causes them to feel disloyal to their access parents.

The children’s other parent will also be a part of your family too now. What goes on in their home may also influence your blended family because of how it affects the children on access.

Don’t undermine the other parent to the kids. They love both of you and want to remain loyal to both parents.

Undermining the other parent will push away the kids.

Have you decided what after school activities you want the kids to do such as dance, gymnastics, swimming, football, soccer, basketball etc?

If this is financially viable, it helps the kids understand what it is to think as a team.

It is important to make time for the kids by doing fun things with them, whether inside or outside the home.

The most important thing is don’t stop thinking as a couple. Prioritise time together for date nights. You may need to find someone who can babysit on a regular basis to make this happen.

If the children are the same age, this may cause competition between them. This is normal. It helps if you can spend time with the kids one on one so they feel special in their own way.

Remember your children are going to experience feelings they don’t understand and won’t know how to communicate them to you.

Let them know whatever they’re feeling, you’re both there to listen without judgement.

Don’t ever take your frustrations out on the children. Remember, they didn’t ask to be part of a blended family.

Build them up. Encourage them. Comment on their attributes and not their weaknesses.

Whatever you’re going through as a blended family if you would like further support click on the link below for a booking today.

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