Each family system is different.
The way parents were raised may be different to the way they raise their children.
Decades ago, children were seen and not heard. Children and adolescents did not have a voice within the family unit and they did not feel heard or validated.
These days there is more education around relationships with your children and adolescents.
Growing up for parents today, they may have heard:
- “Do as I say because I said so!!”
- “Stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about!!”
- “You’re a naughty boy or naughty girl!!”
- “Go to the naughty corner because that’s for naughty girls or naughty boys!!”
- “Big boys don’t cry!!”
- “Eat all your vegies or there’s nothing else and you’ll have to eat it tomorrow night!!”
All these statements are dismissive of a child’s feelings and emotions.
Small children have not learnt to validate their feelings and should not be berated for their emotions.
Words are powerful and children carry the messages of these words with them into adulthood.
Children believe what their parents say to them and about them and because words are powerful, why not build your children up and tell them you’re proud of them, how much you love them, and you know that whatever they put their mind to, they will succeed with hard work!
Children need building up, encouragement and support. They need our emotional investment and for us to be their number one cheerleader.
If you would like support with your child/adolescent please click on the link below for a booking today.
