What causes conflict in relationships?

Couples often spend their days in conflict rather than living in harmony.
What causes conflict in relationships?
As children, we will be modelled by our parents or primary care-givers how to deal with conflict. We will be taught to deal with conflict in a healthy manner or in a dysfunctional way which may consist of arguing, screaming, yelling, name-calling or even hitting and punching or maybe the silent treatment if not for a few hours, a few days or even months.
Two people come together from two entirely different backgrounds who expect to form a long-lasting relationship.
So how do two people find common ground?
When there is conflict, each person needs to listen to the other, instead of deflecting onto the other person.
When in conflict, one person will accuse the other of something, while the other deflects the accusation back at them. This is never helpful.
There is a lot to be said for just listening.
Listen to what your partner is saying.
When two people are talking or yelling over the other, they’re both saying “I’m right, you need to listen to ME!!” The most common reason for the conflict is the way two people communicate. Often it’s in what is not being said where the main issue lies. Maybe the real issue lies in the lack of affection between a couple or not making time for each other at the end of a long day or one person wants to share what happened in their day and the other person shuts them down and walks away.
Conflict is often the symptom but not the root cause of their disconnection.
Take time to listen to each other and to really reconnect, even make a date night once a week that is a convenient night for both of you.
If you have small children or a baby and you can’t find a sitter, wait until the children are in bed and curl up together with a romantic movie & a nice meal.
Remember, the goal is to reconnect and find what attracted you both to each other as in your dating days.